As one of her first moves as Mexico’s new president, Claudia Sheinbaum has declared that she plans to build a wall along the border with the USA and she expects them to pay for it.

“We proud Mexican citizens are tired of all these people coming from the US ruining our country. They send rapists, mentally ill, liars, felons, misogynists, sexual predators, and bigots. Admittedly, the only person fitting all those descriptions is the newly elected president of that morally bankrupt country. But with that buffoon in charge, can more like him be far behind? Stay out of our country! They’ve never even had a woman running the joint. How backwards is that? Hello, losers! It’s the 21st century!”

They’re eating the Taco Bells!

That’s not all that concerns her. She continued, “As if all that weren’t enough, they’re going to come down here and try to open up Taco Bells. Taco Bell!! In Mexico! Are they kidding? Why not open a Red Lobster in Maine? Or Papa John’s in Naples? We’re Mexican! We know how Mexican food is supposed to taste and that ain’t it!”

She concluded by declaring, “Keep your crappy food and your corrupt leaders and their reprehensible ways out of Mexico. Stay behind that wall and pay up when the bill comes!”